People Actually Say This?

Just the other day we found a short blog from Creating a Family on the stupid things people say about adoption. We will share with you a few things people have actually said out loud to someone who has adopted, considered adoption or are in the process of adopting:

1. “You can’t register here because you are not really expecting.” (Said to a soon-to-be adoptive mom when she tried to register at Babies“R”Us.)
2. “I couldn't love a child that wasn't mine. I just don’t get why people would want to adopt.”
3. “You never know what you are going to get when you adopt!” and this little jewel:  “Why would you want to adopt someone else’s reject?”
4. “If you adopt from foster care, the child will go back to their bio family just as soon as they are old enough.”
5. “You’re doing it the easy way.” (Said to a women who was having a rough adoption journey after a long struggle with infertility.)

We were amazed at the lack of sensitivity sometimes displayed toward adoptive parents to be.  As prospective adoptive parents know, a big part of the process is educating those around them about why they are interested in adopting and the adoption process itself.  Using positive terminology about adoption is helpful.  And, politely but firmly  responding to some of these negative and hurtful comments may help the speaker think more carefully next time. 

Drafted by Brittany Alness, staff member of the Law Offices of Karen S. Law, PLC.
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